Tag Archives: Amateur Dramatics

Voyage to the New World

It is somewhat stunning to realise that we have not posted anything on here so far this year. It is a measure of this longest stretch of lockdown that time has lost its meaning, and apathy and lethargy has become equally pandemic. It is also a measure of the fact that as a group we in the Petuaria Players still have no real news to impart. The recent awful peaks of infection and the changing roadmaps made it clear very quickly that a resumption of performances and audiences was still a long way off. On the other hand, the vaccine programme and this depressingly strict but very necessary lockdown is turning the tide fast.

Talking of tides, and stretching the metaphor into the regions of hyperbole, perhaps the situation can be summed up in a more frivolous and tongue-in-cheek way……

In this longest and darkest of nights, as the good ship ‘HMS Britain’ sails on through the turbulent seas of the pandemic, weathering many storms, its crew confined to quarters, our hatches battened down, amidst mutinous mutterings from those below decks, the ship’s surgeon struggling with an overflowing sick bay, drifting aimlessly at times in the doldrums, despatches from the Admiralty in London at last suggest that a gentle glow of light has appeared on the horizon. It may be a false dawn, it may be the promise of sunshine and smiles. And yet that light is at present a distant one, shining on a land still beyond the horizon, an as yet unknown and uncharted territory. Until we hear ‘Land Ho!’ shouted from the crows nest of Downing Street we cannot visualise the landscape and the peoples of this terra-firma onto which we all desperately wish to set our weary feet.

Cmdr. Hancock, the ship’s surgeon is distributing the lime juice of our vaccines to fight the scurvy of Covid. We have our protective masks as we venture out and climb the rigging to set the sails towards this New World. When will we enter port and hoist our ensign, our village hall banner, once again? When will we be able to act out our trade with the indigenous population? Will we be so encrusted with the weary barnacles of this long voyage that we must enter dry dock to restore our skills and enthusiasm?

As long as all the ships in the fleet continue to sail in the same direction we will surely arrive at our destination and begin our new adventures in a new world.

Hmm. So we remain in uncertainty. There is such a lack of clarity that positive plans for the future cannot yet be made but rest assured, at some point we will be back, even if changes have to be made to our traditional production formats.

Meanwhile the group continues to Zoom regularly with our online play readings and weekly quiz nights.

And on here you can expect some more throwback posts to remind us of the enjoyable productions of the past.

Meanwhile, if you are forgetting our visages then I enclose a reminder – I do not vouch, however, for their accuracy or representation of our current appearances……

Until then, stay safe, and be optimistic about that sunny horizon.

Our traditional actors…..
And not forgetting future ones…….

Season’s greetings!

No – not the Alan Ayckbourn play of that name. No really, seasonal greetings – all of us at the Petuaria Players wish you a Happy Christmas wherever you will be, whether it be normal or different this year of years.

We look forward to getting back to entertaining you on stage in the future.

Throwback #7

CONFUSIONS (2008)

Was it really August since our last article was posted on here? When time should be dragging it seems to be rushing. Once again we have a flashback to 2008 to another Alan Ayckbourn play, one which kept everyone on their toes with numerous parts and characters to cope with.

Yes, remember 2008? The year of the financial crisis and start of a decade of waiting for recovery – and where are we today? On the other hand Obama became President of the USA with the promise of a great future. And where are we today? And Lewis Hamilton became F1 World Champion for the first time and…. well at least some things never change!

And in November of that year we took on the challenge of Confusions. This consists of five one act plays all loosely linked by either a character moving from one play to another, or the same location. But the themes of obsession, isolation and companionship appear in comedy form.

Richard Bateman produced the play and, by necessity, acted in it too.

Confusions by Alan Ayckbourn – a comedy in five acts, performed in November 2008

Act 1 – Mother Figure
A mother (Lucy) unable to escape from from her children bound existence treats her concerned neighbours as children…

Act 2 – Drinking Companion
Lucy’s errant husband Harry is away overnight on business and at his hotel desperately flirts with and attempts to seduce the attractive saleswoman also staying there…

Act 3 – Between Mouthfuls
The waiter at the hotel in Act 2 finds himself serving in the restaurant there, where two couples at separate tables find they have an unwelcome common bond…

Act 4 – Gosforth’s Fête
In this the most chaotic and farcical act, we find Councillor Mrs. Pearce (previously seen at dinner in Act 3) invited to open Gosforth’s village fete. But when one of the ladies’ personal news is accidentally broadcast over the site PA, a catalogue of disasters and embarrassments are revealed…

Act 5 – A Talk in The Park
In the same park where the Fete took place, sit five strangers on separate park benches, each with their own troubles. When Arthur sits next to Beryl to relate his story an uncomfortable Beryl eventually escapes and joins the person at the next bench – where she now relates her own feelings – and so it continues as each one moves to the next bench…. .

Cast: (from L) Janet Drewery, Richard Bateman, Jayne Hewson, Rob Newton, Nic Johnson, Emma Gibson, Phil Johnson, Dianne Turner
Our backstage crew

More throwbacks soon! (honest)


Throwback #6

IMPROBABLE FICTION (2008)

Going back to 2008 and the very mention of ‘Improbable Fiction’ brings wry smiles to the cast as they think ‘costumes’. More of that shortly.

Alan Ayckbourn’s ‘Improbable Fiction’ was the final play of the season before our summer break that year. It had read well and we all found it hilarious and zany and we looked forward to rehearsals. Janet Drewery took on the responsibility for producing and directing this ambitious production.

It is a light hearted play that centres around Arnold, who runs the Pendon Writers Circle, a group of not particularly talented, unexciting, amateur, aspirational wannabe authors. Arnold himself is a writer of instruction manuals – which gives you an idea of the level of his creative imagination. With his unseen bedridden mother upstairs they meet regularly in his front room. Act One amusingly shows one of these meetings and reveals the characters and their planned novels.

Improbable Fiction by Alan Ayckbourn, performed in 2008

Where the whole play bursts into farcical dream-like fantasy is act two where by some mysterious means the ever sensible and boring Arnold finds himself living in those novels brought vividly to life. However, all five novels and genres become entwined in a comic saga of mayhem that leaves poor Arnold in a very confused state.

Now let me say up front that this was a successful and fun play to do, a production we are proud of. I say all this because behind the scenes we also have fond and amusing memories where things didn’t always quite go to plan……..

When I said earlier ‘costumes’ comes to mind that was related to the ambitious second act. Act one was normality for us. But I doubt the audience were ready for the zany antics of act two. Neither were we really. With no scene changes, just continuous action throughout the whole play, we knew that we were coming off and on stage as different characters with different costumes as we swapped continually between the interwoven five storylines of the writers’ imagination.

Slideshow: Act One

Only when we all went to a Leeds costumiers to select what turned out to be our largest collection of costumes for a single play and possibly our largest hire bill did we begin to realise what we had in store. It was only when the hire costumes arrived – in time for the tech and dress rehearsals – that the practicalities of everyone actually getting into various costumes at speed, to go on for a few lines, and then off and into another, did we realise the challenges we had. Rehearsals had involved no costume changes other than in our imagination. Reality, we discovered, took ten times as long.

The audience was subjected to such a frenzied fast moving confusion of zany characters and plots that they could never have known the tension, stress and sweat backstage, with just seconds to change; the shouts backstage of “which ******* character am I now?” and “Which ***** outfit am I supposed to be in?” We were very afraid of turning up for a three minute scene in the wrong costume. Indeed even our lines had us confused as we announced ourselves with wrong names…. It was, however, all in keeping with the manic plot and unless your name was Alan Ayckbourn the audience could never have known.

Slideshow: Act Two

And who can forget Dianne’s stunning portrayal of a squirrel. Our fondest memory, and hers, was the night she seemed to be wandering around the stage in a drunken fashion, seemingly having lost all sense of direction and had also forgotten to put on her squirrel paws. It turned out that in her frantic rush to change into the squirrel outfit backstage and rush back on in time for her entrance, she realised, too late, that she had thrown the paws into the squirrel head at her last costume change. As she dashed onto stage ramming the head into place the paws slid forward inside and over the eye sockets leaving her stumbling around blind. More suppressed laughter on stage.

As if this mix of characters and plot genres wasn’t enough – a children’s story, a romance, science fiction, crime detection and… a musical – we had to blast our way through a song and choreographed dance routine every night. The song and dance “There’ll be light at the end of the tunnel” took on a new meaning one night when the lighting cable suddenly disconnected plunging the stage into darkness. With a frantic and stressed Richard scrabbling and cursing in the pitch black under the mixer desk amidst a spaghetti bunch of cables we valiantly carried on in true showmanship fashion, our costume glitter sparkling in the pale green hue of the emergency lights. As full light was restored moments later to the line ‘There’ll be light….” the audience was no doubt impressed with our stunning and creative lighting design.

The cast L to R; Rob Newton, Phil Johnson, Gill Collins, Tina Addington, Rachel Miller, Steve Howland and somewhere.. Dianne Turner. Probably still lost in her squirrel costume or burying nuts.

But as I said, despite these humorous memories, we put on a great production and the audience only saw performances they thoroughly enjoyed.

Plenty of backstage and front of house support – it was needed! Anneka Stephenson (standing far right) was on hand to choreograph our dance routine.

More memories soon!

Keep following us or register your email on this website to keep up to date with future posts and news, when it comes, of when we can resume our productions. Fingers crossed!